You will want your husband very much, but he will rule over you.”

Jonah 4:4, 9-11 (MSG) 

(Regards Nineveh’s repentance) Then the Lord said, “Do you think it is right for you to be angry?” 9 Then God said to Jonah, “What right do you have to get angry about this shade tree?” Jonah said, “Plenty of right. It’s made me angry enough to die!” 10-11 God said, “What’s this? How is it that you can change your feelings from pleasure to anger overnight about a mere shade tree that you did nothing to get? You neither planted nor watered it. It grew up one night and died the next night. So, why can’t I likewise change what I feel about Nineveh from anger to pleasure, this big city of more than 120,000 childlike people who don’t yet know right from wrong, to say nothing of all the innocent animals?”

Husbands who are yet to be broken, fixed, and completely touched by God are in a way like Nineveh to wives. Most men are generally selfish. The degree of selfishness may be different, but they are basically selfish people. But the problem is that, like Nineveh, husbands do not know that they are being selfish! Unless God personally touches “Nineveh” in His perfect timing, your husbands will not have the ability to understand and comprehend. If Jonah had warned Nineveh at his own timing without proper guidance from God, the people of “Nineveh” would have had him killed instead of repenting. This is the same reason why wives become even more hurt by their husbands. The wives try speaking to their husbands. They want to discuss how they are hurt and they desire understanding from their husbands but since God has not given them the ability to understand or comprehend, the wives usually do not get what they desire. 

Like the tree that gave peace and comfort to Jonah, from time to time, God will allow the wives to have a taste of peace and comfort from their husbands even before the husbands are wholly touched or broken by God. God may give a taste to the wives of what God can do to their husbands or improve their situation better if God decides. 

God is telling the wives, “You did not do anything to receive that peace and comfort. I can make it happen over night (Like how the tree grew over night and had given the shade). I can create a situation of peace and comfort over night if I desire too. Your husband’s hearts are no exception. I can touch anyone’s heart and soften it. Nothing is impossible.”

God wants the wives to “warn” their husbands. What does this mean spiritually? It means that wives must kindly, lovingly, patiently and with endurance guide their husbands with the wisdom and guidance of the Holy Spirit. Do Not try to advise your husbands from your positions of hurt, self-pity, or you feel the need to make them realize and understand. It is NOT up to you! The timing belongs to God. But too many times, when wives are in a uncomfortable situation due to their husband’s ignorant behaviors, the wives, like Jonah get upset and angry as though they have a “right.” So God asked two times in verses 4 and 9. 

Then the Lord said, “Do you think it is right for you to be angry?”

Even though God does not directly ask the wives and nor do the wives answer like Jonah “Yes I do have right.” But in most cases, the wives act and talk like they have the right to get upset and angry. The basic root problem of wives is their ‘desire’ to possess the husband’s heart, love, kindness, understanding….everything! 

Genesis 3:16 Then God said to the woman, “I will cause you to have much trouble when you are pregnant. And when you give birth to children, you will have much pain. You will want your husband very much, but he will rule over you.”

Unless the wives properly understand that they will have to suffer and go through much pain until the birth of life (transformation of their husbands), the wives will desire their husbands very much. Their husbands will rule over them. Wives, you do not want your husbands to rule over you. You want your husbands to tenderly love you but it all up to YOU, WIVES. 

1 Timothy 2:11-15 Let a woman learn by listening quietly [in silence] and being ready to cooperate in everything [in full/all submission]. 12 But I do not allow a woman to teach or to have [assumed; exercise] authority over a man [or her husband], but to listen quietly [be quiet], 13 because Adam was formed first and then Eve.14 And Adam was not tricked[deceived; led astray], but the woman was tricked [deceived; led astray] and became a sinner [transgressor]. 15 But she will be saved through having children [or motherhood; less likely, a reference to the birth of Christ] if she continues in faith, love, and holiness, with self-control [propriety; good sense].

1 Timothy applies more to wives whose husbands are not yet transformed. God wants the wives not to preach, teach, advise when the wives themselves are not yet properly broken. Wives should only listen quietly and be ready to cooperate in everything with full all submission. This way, the wives will be broken since this submission process will require much practice of patience, endurance, and self control. She needs to continue in faith, love, holiness with self control and good sense. Only if the wives follow the steps the bible teaches, they will conquer the land of their husbands even though it may take some time. 

Pastor Yoojin